There is no rest for the weary.

5 days until launch.

And the winner is...

MISS DAISY!

No wait.

LARGE MARGE!

No wait.

YES!  LARGE MARGE WINS!

Objection your honor!

Looks like we're going to have a recount.  Up until 3 days ago Miss Daisy had a 1-vote advantage.  I was about to update my blog to announce the winner, and the internet broke (Al Gore's fault).  And to top it all I received 2 late votes for Large Marge the day before yesterday.

What to do?  Have a recount?  Have a debate?  Death match?  Raise the debt limit?

Sorry folks but this is no democracy.  Meaning, I do whatever I want.  You're probably better that way anyway, I know what I'm doing.  Large Marge it is.  If you ain't happy, please file a complaint ($5 per complaint - gotta finance my trip).

Tomorrow is my last day at work for a while... this is a bittersweet moment... sweet that I won't have to wake up in the morning, bitter that I won't get paid... but that doesn't mean I'm not going to work.  This is not a vacation, folks!  There are a lot of things I want to accomplish during my trip which will take some effort.  Most nobably:

- Learn a new language.  As soon as I enter Central America, I will make every effort to speak spanish with everyone I meet and strive to become fluent or as close to it as possible by the time of my return.  I wonder what accent I'm gonna have when I speak spanish - french Canadian?  American?  Or something weird like my current accent that sounds like a mix between South Texas and Austria?

- Learn to cook.  I'm not too fond of this one, but it will quickly become a necessity given my budget and amenities... frozen dinners aren't an option, and restaurants will be few and far between in some countries.  This is as good an incentive as any to change my diet, learn to make simple things that actually don't taste like shoe, conquer my fear of vegetables and otherwise get into some good habits.

- Get fit again.  Over the last few years I have become pretty good at losing weight, and even better at gaining it back.  During this trip I will have ample opportunity to exercise - through morning (for you daylight creatures, this will correspond to mid afternoon) workouts, hiking, swimming and whatever else I can think of.

- Learn to take good pictures.  I have the coolest camera that will do wonders if I ever figure out how it works.  With the help of a few books, friendly advice and lots of experimentation I should eventually get there.  I know I will see wonderful things, and am looking forward to sharing with you.

- Measure, measure, measure.  Continuing my never ending quest (read: obsession) to figure out what it all really means, I will quantify my life over the next 6 months through a set of measurements.  I am the kind of person who can best understand things in mathematical terms (nothing else makes sense to me, really) - and with the help of my personal computer, a small army of spreadsheets and a keen eye for the countable I plan to do just that.  Examples of some of the things I intend to measure:

• Large Marge's gas mileage by speed and terrain
• Cost of daily living, in the city or on the road
• Variable growth rate of my head and facial hair (I am shaving it all right before I go)
• Time delay of various types of hot peppers (and degree of pain at time of eviction)
• And more (any suggestions?)

With all that aside, this trip won't be a success if I don't learn to enjoy it.  That means have fun, stop complaining and take it one day at a time.  One of the main purposes of this trip is to put everything else in perspective, figure out what really matters.  I just hope that I come back a better person.

This was my last post before I leave.  I'm a bit sad, scared to death, and excited like I've never been.  Next time you visit this site, I will be on the road.  Wish me luck.

Goodbye, Chicago!
Welcome, America!

DMR

Preparation Shmeparation

21 days to launch.

Welcome back all.  Thanks for all the great comments, support and advice!

Over the past few months I have had to do a number of things in order to prepare for my trip.  For example, I had to tell my boss that I was going on a 6-month leave of absence.  That was a very pleasant conversation.  I'd do it again if I could.

Other fun things that I have had to do (with attached stories):

1. Buy a van.  

Yes, the famous van-that-has-no-name, wasn't born in my driveway.  It took me 2 months to find the right van, and then 1 week to buy a different one.  Here's the short of the story.

At first, I didn't know what I was looking for.  I thought I'd just buy an old Econoline, remove the back seats and put a mattress in the back.  Sounded great until I started thinking of how great it would be when I hit Brazil, with 100 degree humidity and 100 degree weather... and also how the heck I was gonna clean myself when I hit the wild for more than two days, and avoid becoming a petri dish for undiscovered fungus colonies... so I abandoned this cool idea.

I needed something more... versatile.  With a shower.  With A/C and a generator.

Godsend!  I found the Class 2 vans, which are actually quite rare and very hard to find.  After two weeks of searching I found exactly what I was looking for.  Great van, great price.  I called the owner - he seemed a little bit confused at first but I managed to have him agree to send me all the information the next day.  That never came, so I called the man back - he didn't remember me.  Ugh.  That's a good start.  After a while, I got a second call from his son (who was 60 years old) telling me that I had been trying to deal with his 89 year old father who has Altzheimer's.  Nice!  From them on, it was smoother sailing because I was working with the younger man.  Right.

Until I got the certified check from the bank (I was financing it).  I sent him a copy of it, and he comes back to me 2 days later telling me the check is fake.  My certified bank check was fake.  Woo!  In fact, he had thought it was so fake that he had gotten the FBI involved.  FBI also thought it was fake.  So in earnest I suggest to the man that I will just pay cash.  I will bring a wad of cash on the airplane, hope not to get mugged between the airplane and the swamp where they lived, take it to his bank and do the deed.

He refused.  Thought my cash would also be fake.

But when I told him I was an alien, he believed me.  Weird.

Maybe the old man was the sane one after all.  So I walked away from the deal.

10 days later, I purchased a second van near Detroit, paid cash, and I managed not to scam anyone during the process.  Yay!

FBI Most Wanted.
Carries cash.  Do not approach him.  He might slap you with it.

2. Sell my car.

This one went a little bit better... I posted my car on ebay motors, and quickly got lots of interest.  

At first I received a few whackjob offers, including a guy who was willing to exchange a 5 acre piece of land near Vegas against my Benz.  I almost considered it.

The most interesting story is from the first prospective buyer, I met him at a garage with his son (car was for his son), went on a road test, everything went well.  There were a few questions about scratches on the back bumper and a piece missing that I had ordered, all sounded good, he was going to get back to me with an offer the next morning.

Well... not so fast...

Somehow I managed to find myself at Fat Willie's Rib Shack in Chicago that night, ordered a 40 ounce bottle of beer, and I had just finished it (and a few rum cokes) that the man calls me back.  His wife was worried about two things: 1) the serpentine belt, had it ever been replaced?  and 2) had I ever crashed my car which could have caused the bumper damage?

Somehow in my drunken bliss, I decided to make a great attempt at humor and answered with the following:

1) I don't even know what a serpentine belt is, for all I know I don't even have one (insert mirth and laughter here) !

2) I might have crashed it a couple times, but the car still runs good (shake head here) !?

The man never called back (I still wonder why).  The morale of the story is as follows:

• It's usually the wife's fault
• If it's not the wife's fault, you can always blame it on the alcohol

No biggie - I sold the car the following week for a higher price, to a nice young man who happened to meet me when I was sober.  That was easy!

The guilty bottle - it made me do it !

Good bye Benz!  Hello Roadtrek!

3. Move out of my house.

Yep!  I have already moved out.  I am homeless.

I was just reminded how painful it is to move when you are a compulsive collector of junk.  My heart broke a billion times when I had to face the decision whether to keep something useless in case it would become useful some day (wishful thinking), or to toss it and feel like I'm giving my firstborn away.  After a while I devised an ingenious idea to fix my dilemma and make the process easier on my poor little heart... I just closed my eyes, and shoved everything in a plastic bag.  If I don't know what it is I am throwing away, it can't hurt right?

Just kidding.  But it was still painful.  Threw most of the junk away, sold a lot of my furniture, and put the rest in storage.

And I'm not completely homeless.  My friend Hector graciously lets me stay on the top floor of his house - I call it the jungle.  Average temperature 118 degrees, with 99% humidity - great practice for my trip!  All that's missing is 2-3 snakes, tigers or angry mexicans attacking me every night, and I wouldn't ever need to leave home.  I love it!

4. Everything else

Otherwise, everything is neatly packed away in the van.  I bought a number of goodies, including portable grill, small tent, first-aid kit, and the like.  The van is already equipped with microwave, toilet, shower, stove, cabinets, bed and more... and I have loaded it with everything I could fit in there, chairs, fishing gear, clothes, and lots of toilet paper (viva la turista!).

I just have to figure out how it works now... with the septic pumps and all.  I have heard horror stories about people pressing the "evacuate" button without having properly secured the pipe... hilarity ensues... but since I'm not a huge fan of hilarity, I'll try to learn how to do it right the first time.

Finally, I wanted to share with you the 3 top contenders for my Name the Van contest!  They are:

- Large Marge (taken from Pee Wee's Great Adventure)
- Miss Daisy (as in... driving Miss Daisy duh!)
- Gardulla (as in... Gardulla the Hutt, a close friend of Jabba)

I'll need a final vote!  The winner gets a ride around town in their own namesake, plus a glass of champagne.  And they get to be the first to try out my toilet afterwards.

WHO WILL IT BE ?

Sweet little Miss Daisy

Gardulla... I am mean and hungry

Large Marge... Weeeeeeeeeee

Before I leave, here are a few more pictures of my new 5-star hotel on wheels.  Enjoy!

Looks kinda scary right?  Maybe we should call it The Beast.

Dash board.  Someone is gonna have to show me how to use my camera, everything looks green outside.

Stove and storage.

More storage, including the back seat that converts into a bed and dining table on the floor.

I can find anything now.  Almost.

The force is strong within me... Aaaaahhhh...

Until next time!  Thanks again for the comments!  And let me know of your vote!

The world is my playground

Hello everyone and welcome to my travel blog.  This is my first time blogging, so please bear with me... I don't really know what I'm doing, and this will be a work in process.  I'm pretty sure it will get better as I go along...

So what the hell is going on?  Who is this crazy Moebius?  And where is he going?

Well, you may have guessed, this is all about me baby.  Denis Roy aka Moebius (have thought of legally changing the name but never quite had the guts).  Some more info for those interested:

Age: 35.3

Born:  Chicoutimi, Quebec Canada

Lives in:  Chicago, IL (but that's about to change)

Sign:  Aries

Moebius - that's me !

Most of you probably know by now, but over the past couple years I have been toying with the idea of going on a long, long trip.  Sort of a world/self-exploration combo.  Take a break and see what else I've been missing.  This trip I have decided will be in America - might as well start in my own backyard, I barely know it!

This will be a driving trip. I intend to drive randomly, but in a generally southward direction, with no more than 1-2 week notice on my whereabouts.  I don't want to plan too far ahead, that would defeat the purpose...

But here is my general idea:

• Start by going East, heading to NYC with a day at Cedar Point, OH
• Lounge the coast north towards Quebec, where I will spend a few weeks with friends and family
• Head due west towards Vancouver through the rockies
• Drive south to San Francisco
• Head back to the rockies
• South through Texas, to the Mexican border
• Cross Central America and emerge in Columbia, the first country in South America
• From there, tour South America in a generally clockwise direction

If I go as far as I have been thinking, I will visit all 23 countries of the mainland Americas and end in Ecuador.  See the map below for a rough outline.  The countries crossed would be in the following order:

USA - Canada - USA - Mexico - Belize - Guatemala - El Salvador - Honduras - Nicaragua - Costa Rica - Panama - Colombia - Venezuela - Guyana - Suriname - French Guiana - Brazil - Paraguay - Uruguay - Argentina - Chile - Bolivia - Peru - Ecuador.

I'm not taking any of this for granted though.  Anything could happen, I might decide to stay in one single country for a couple months if I fancy, so we'll only know at the end how I did... no pressure...

As for company, well I'm going to do most of it by myself.  I'm sure some of you will join me along the way for a couple miles, and I'm sure I will meet others here and there, but for the most part I'm doing this on my own - and that's the way I want it.

Well... not entirely alone.  I have 2 small companions as you'll see in the picture below: Yoda and his bastard son, Monster (mother undetermined).  Now I feel much safer.

And of course, let's not forget about the most important part - the means of transportation.  Here she is, big, happy, motherly.  My new girlfriend for the next 6 or so months.  She's a Roadtrek with some good road experience, and I already like her a lot.

Help me find a name for her !

So that's it.  Here you have it.  The plans have been unveiled.  And this blog officially started.  I promise I will try not to bore you with uninteresting details.  For the most part I will share fun facts and stories, and perhaps a thought or two about how I'm doing otherwise.

I would really enjoy if you left comments to tell me you're reading this and following this trip with me, I will need all the support I can get. And feel free to ask any questions, send emails or whatnot and I promise to get back to everyone as promptly as I can!

For now, I will leave you all with the following challenge - can you please help me find a name for my van?

Until then...

DMR